Relationships have a natural ebb and flow to them. Sometimes a connection that sparks due to shared interests and proximity can cool off when a person moves away. While this can be sad, it also creates space for new relationships.
I heard a quote once that people are friends for a reason, a season or a lifetime, and that seems to fit. While having lifetime friends feels wonderful, we only have so much room in our lives to dedicate to that kind of relationship. Sometimes change is good and allows us to be open to new people in our life.
And even then, each relationship is very different.
One of my oldest and closest friends is someone I’ve known for over twenty years. She’s the sister I never had, and people even comment that we look alike when we’re together. I see her once or twice a year and when I do, it’s magical. We laugh, we cry, we open our hearts in a way that I don’t do with many people. We don’t see each other often and almost never connect when we’re not in person, but we both know that we would do absolutely anything for the other.
Interestingly, through much of our friendship we also agreed that while we love each other dearly, we are enough like siblings that we couldn’t spend a lot of time together without arguing. We learned to act accordingly and it’s made our relationship so much stronger as a result. Though now that we’re older, I think this has changed a bit. We’ll have a great opportunity to see where things are at as she’s moving much closer. I’m excited.
I have other friendships that seem to require the proximity and sadly faded when that was lost. In some cases, we’ve come back together and became friends all over again at a new part of our lives. With others, I have some really wonderful memories.
Relationships are defined by the people involved. It’s hard when one person changes the rules without agreement or communication. Some recent Facebook interactions have me thinking about this. The joys of social media, right? You can hide behind your laptop and connect with people, without actually making a connection. Interesting.
Whether it be a reason, season or lifetime, I greatly appreciate the people in my life. While there are times I’d like to shell off in my house and try to say I’m an introvert, I know I need to face that I’m not! It’s my connections to other people that give me pain sometimes, but also give me great joy and a sense of belonging.
Our relationships also give us such a wonderful opportunity to learn more about ourselves.